ABOUT ME

 

I worked for many years as an Educational Psychologist, which was a rewarding job, helping children, young people, their families and teachers.

I continue to develop as a person and counsellor through my own personal therapy and supervision.

I aim to be truly Person-Centred, treating my clients as unique, rather than defined by normative concepts of gender, sexuality, ethnicity, religion, disability or appearance. I approach each client with curiosity in their unique way of being. The best way to do this is to listen attentively.

I have regular supervision and develop my professional skills through study and development activities.

Qualifications And Professional Memberships

  • Postgraduate Diploma in Counselling and Psychotherapy with Distinction (Level 7 counselling qualification), Liverpool John Moores University 2019.
  • M.Sc. Educational Psychology, University College London 1998.
  • Registered Member of the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP)

AREAS OF WORK

ANXIETY

A certain level of anxiety is normal, it alerts us to threats. When anxiety feels deeper it stops us from living fully. It might be connected with childhood experiences, self-worth, inner criticism, relationships or perhaps you have had a health scare. I will explore what your anxiety is like for you, in your inner world, and work towards opening up the possibility of change.

Is there more anxiety now than ever? There are good reasons to worry about the state of the world and there is a greater awareness about general and social anxiety. You may be anxious because your internet use is giving you ‘digital overwhelm’, making you anxious about what others think of you and fearing that you are missing out. Maybe you have been shamed and unfairly judged by others on social media.

Some anxiety feels self-imposed. Do you feel anxious if you don’t come up to the standards you set, or if you don’t feel perfect? Perhaps you feel like an impostor and you will be found out. All these things can cause anxiety, tension, pressure and constant worry.

DEPRESSION

You may be looking for counselling because you are weighed down with depression. Maybe you are going through work related stress that is leaving you feeling down, overwhelmed and wondering if you are in the right job. Perhaps you have had periods of low mood that have come and gone throughout your life. Or you have been prescribed medication and your doctor has advised you to look for talking therapy as well.

I will spend time getting to know what life is like for you, rather than as ‘a person with depression’. Your low feelings are part of you but I’m curious about more than that, about how all the parts of you fit together. Maybe you’ve never told anyone what your inner life is really like and it’s a relief finally to do so. It can be exhausting to keep saying you are ‘fine’ to everyone, when inside you are not.

BEREAVEMENT

If someone close to you has died, this experience is unique to you. You may have heard about stages of grief, but it’s different for us all. I think it is important not to think of a death as something to ‘get over’, but to find a way to carry on living while loved ones remain part of us. I find it helpful to think of continuing bonds with loved ones who have died. But I’m also aware that those bonds can be complicated, depending on the relationship.

If your feelings are getting in the way of living, you may be caught up in your grief and need help to process your loss so that you can live more fully. You may just be in so much pain that it helps to express that with another person.

There is no right or wrong time to seek help with bereavement, but often it can be after a few months or the first year, when others don’t remember the anniversary and give you the impression that it’s time you pulled yourself together and got on with life. It may be many years later.

My bereavement work is not just about loss through death. Sometimes life events can be a loss. It could be the loss of an imagined future when a relationship ends, when an accident means you have to leave a job you love, or the sadness you feel when your children have grown up. These are all losses.

TRAUMA

Trauma can be caused by anything intensely fearful or shocking, like an accident, bullying or harassment at work or school, or being a victim of crime. If the fear stays with you and is not resolved, you can feel like you are stuck in a loop, returning repeatedly to the feelings of fear. I can work with you by providing a safe place to explore the fear and process it in a positive way.

Repeated exposure to neglect and abuse can lead to complex trauma. This is true not only for survivors of severe abuse, but also if you have experienced continual criticism as a child or never been allowed to have your feelings believed or heard. You may be having visual and emotional flashbacks, sleep disturbance, shame, panic, anxiety and low self-esteem. I will explore how your earlier experiences remain with you, so that you can process your feelings and learn to put these experiences into the past.

STRESSFUL LIFE CHANGES

Life changes make us feel unsettled and anxious while we struggle to adapt to a new way of living. Half of all marriages and partnerships end in separation or divorce. You may be wondering about your current relationship and how to improve it or whether it is still right for you. You may have experienced the divorce or separation of your own parents when you were younger and still feel the need to process what happened.

Perhaps you have recently retired and you’re wondering why life feels so different. Or you have been forced out of a job you love through redundancy, accident or illness. Some transitions are natural, like getting older or children growing up and leaving home, but they can still be upsetting and difficult to come to terms with.

You may wonder as you get older about the meaning and purpose of your life. It is natural to do so, particularly at transition points like when you have children or reach middle age and older life.

WORKING WITH MEN

Men sometimes carry their problems around, being strong on the outside, like a suit of armour. They leave the talking to others, often women. Your friends might be doing the same, but if you’re the one to admit it, you fear losing your credibility as a real man. There are ways to hide the pressure that builds up inside, through more personal fitness, gambling, alcohol, drugs or porn. There may also be an inner voice telling you to man up and not show vulnerability, but this can be part of the problem.

You may be looking for counselling now because you’re fed up with suffering in silence or someone close to you thinks it would be a good idea. Your partner might be better at spotting the problems because they’re on the receiving end.

There is pressure for men to conform to norms, but masculinity is complicated. We don’t all fit into those norms, just as we don’t all have the same sexuality, body shape or feel comfortable with peer pressure that encourages us to act oppressively to others.

I think counselling can help men become better friends, partners, fathers and lovers. Learning to talk about yourself without fear of judgement can help your state of mind and relationships. When I work with men, they often find it’s a relief to finally let it all out. They feel lighter and open up to change, rather than closing down or manning up just to fit in.

FEES

FEES: In person sessions are £65 per 50 minutes, online sessions are £60. Payable by online bank transfer before the appointment or within three working days after. I will ask you to agree to a contract, which will include my bank details and cancellation terms and conditions.

LOCATION

I work in person with clients in Liverpool city centre on Monday and Wednesday afternoons and early evenings. Appointments start at 1400 and the last one is 1745.